This week I’ve had just about all my students pass their exams (including a few about whom I was rather pessimistic if I’m being honest), and today I was observed and given a grade 2. This means that I am a ‘good’ teacher, apparently. I’m pleased. It’s half-term now and so I will sleep for a week, waiting for the rain to go away.
woah I was all glum because I haven’t heard from someone for weeks but they just called me late at night weeeee I’m happy
turns out they’ve had to work insane amounts of hours because of xmas/new year which I didn’t even consider because I’m so typically needy and selfish (makes me want to puke) I thought I’d just driven them off with my particular banality
I have to milk every opportunity I can to prove (to myself?) that I can be even just a few notches above awful and it’s not a good way to live I would not recommend
though I’m sure you probably already know better
It’s finally the end of term and students and fellow teachers alike have only just realised that I’m Scottish. On Saturday I’m going back to Edinburgh for a week - to have an identity crisis, presumably.
“I watched ‘Trapped in the Closet’ with my father-in-law [Francis Ford Coppola] once and I remember him sitting there in silence for 10 minutes and then saying, ‘This is incredible.’”—Phoenix’s Thomas Mars
I am very annoyed because I was supposed to be observed in class today and so I prepared very carefully and worried a lot and then the person never turned up as they thought I was on a completely different campus. The lesson went so bloody well too! I just wanted to get this done and out of the way but now I have to worry about something specific for another week because somebody couldn’t read a timetable.
the other day there was a student who got in trouble because he was absolutely reeking of weed and my colleague had to have this pointed out to them because they thought it was just a really strong aftershave…
It’s my mums birthday next week so I’ll be taking her out for dinner at a noice korean restaurant in holborn. I wish I could say that this was my idea. What actually happened was she calmly and firmly explained that this is what is going to go down. We go. You pay. My mum’s great, she’s really got her shit together and I hope to one day be even half as unambiguous and indomitable as she is.
I’ve been getting really worn out lately so I talked to my boss and I will hopefully be able to drop the two extra classes I took on a few weeks after I first started. Leaving home at 6am for four days a week is proving a bit much and I’m already teaching for more hours than I’m actually contracted for so it’s all fine fine fine and approved - just need to find someone else to take over. I hesitated to say anything because I hate to be a nuisance but everyone is wonderfully helpful if you just ask. I tend not to like asking for help. Again, nuisance. Fuss. Shame. Stupidity. Just ask. Ask away, it’s fine. It really is! You would help others so it’s not unreasonable that others would help you! So many puerile realisations in my mid-twenties.
“This song is Copyrighted in U.S., under Seal of Copyright # 154085, for a period of 28 years, and anybody caught singin it without our permission, will be mighty good friends of ourn, cause we don’t give a dern. Publish it. Write it. Sing it. Swing to it. Yodel it. We wrote it, that’s all we wanted to do.”—Woody Guthrie’s anti-copyright notice
“Tell me why is it that even when we are enjoying music, for example, or a fine evening or conversation with people we like, why does it all seem to be a hint of some limitless happiness existing somewhere else rather than a real happiness, the kind, that is, we possess ourselves. Why is this?”—"Fathers and Children," (Turgenev 101)
I think that starting to cut my own hair has been one of the more positive habits I’ve adopted at this stage in my life I mean I can literally attack occasional feelings of unease with sharp objects what magic this is
yes so I couldn’t go to work today because it was windy (truly) and I probably could have gotten some things done at home but I didn’t probably because I am a naughty man who will eat well one day and eat terribly the next so I still get the odd spot but I don’t mind too much it makes me feel like I haven’t really changed over the last few years though that surely can’t be the case~
the last arcade fire album was a load of crap but this here newfangled one is actually kinda sorta quite good so I’m just going to forget that the last one ever happened oo-er huh what was I talking about???