February 2012
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Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.
– G.K. Chesterton
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Today I was pleased to discover that there is such a thing as aromachology
The study of the influence of odors on human behavior
huxley pig is an enjoyable show that includes lines such as
“ere that geezer winked at me - honest!”
sam the seagull pointing at a painting of a vampire pig
“Oh crumbs! (pause) I’ll stand on my head.”
huxley pig after smashing a window
there’s also a theme song it’s it’s it’s songg oinky melody
this is my review wot I done for the...
someone obviously broke in and started subtly undermining me because ow 1am is a warm pain eddy rhatharharhar
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calamistrate v. to curl the hair
I must ask anyone entering the house never to contradict me or differ from me in...
– Sir George Sitwell
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January 2012
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December 2011
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Fans of the colourful character called the destruction of the Blobbyland site...
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Mr Blobby theme park wrecked by ravers! →
blobby blobby blobby
– mr blobby (possibly)
At 1.20am I put my face close to the bathroom mirror to stare into my eye and see the reflection of myself looking into my eye
of course I made sure to pee first
November 2011
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Wow! Today was the first time I walked past a cat on the street without it...
– Excerpt from my upcoming best seller* ‘Cat Fancy: My Struggle For Cat Approval - A Journey’
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A spider has resided in a corner of the bathroom ceiling for several days now. Imagine my surprise when, upon closer inspection, I discovered that it had the face of David Cameron and was giggling and furiously writing notes whilst watching me do a wee.
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October 2011
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August 2011
ashdinosaur asked: WOT U BLOGGIN?
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July 2011
Was a bit disturbed (read: actually not that surprised) how quickly the breaking news of Amy Winehouse’s death was followed by a BBC journalist remarking that the whole affair was particularly upsetting because the British music industry would be losing a major source of income.
But seriously there are likely about 25 of them in the UK so I think I deserve some sort of medal or badge for my walking-to-the-post-office skills
Saw an albino squirrel yesterday morning
Living life in the fast lane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
May 2011
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April 2011
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Got a book on Amazon for £2 three novels in one (congested?) quite good shall be food chewed and digested
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Pretty sure I also saw the Liberal Democrat logo draining of it’s colour so that it remained an empty shell
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Dreamt that I lived across the road from Douglas Adams. There was a table outside his house with a plastic box on it. This is where his mail went. Fans would send him big bags of sweets and packets of noodles. I would open the box and rummage around in it with desire to steal some of these treats but I would feel very guilty and not do it because I really like Douglas Adams and those sweets and...